Attention, job seekers!
You’ve been fed the same boring, regurgitated resume advice for years: “Use keywords. Keep it professional. Don’t get creative.”
But what if that’s completely wrong?
What if hiring managers don’t care about your bullet points but just want a good story?
What if your traditional resume is getting ignored while the guy who submitted a meme-laden, comic book-style resume is getting interviews left and right?
It was time to put these theories to the test. So, I did what any highly scientific, completely unhinged job seeker would do—I submitted wildly different versions of my resume to real job postings to see which one would get the most responses.
The results? Shocking. Hilarious. Mildly terrifying. Let’s break it down.
The Four Contenders
For this grueling, no-holds-barred resume experiment, I created four versions of my resume and applied to 50 jobs with each one.
Here’s what went out into the world:
1. The Traditional Resume (a.k.a. “The Safe Bet”)
This was the classic boring-but-trustworthy resume. Standard layout. Bullet points. A neutral-toned, professional vibe that said, I am a serious adult who files taxes on time and never double-dips chips.
2. The Keyword-Stuffed ATS Cheat Code (a.k.a. “The Robot Whisperer”)
This bad boy was drenched in keywords. I crammed in every industry buzzword like it was a stuffing contest at Thanksgiving. If the ATS wanted “results-driven, proactive, strategic, solution-oriented leadership”, it got them.
3. The Storytelling Resume (a.k.a. “The ‘Trust Me, You’ll Wanna Hire Me’ Approach”)
Instead of cold, dead bullet points, this version was a gripping narrative. It read like a hero’s journey, painting me as the underdog who conquered challenges and saved companies from the brink of disaster. It was dramatic. It was inspiring. It was borderline Oscar-worthy.
4. The ‘Creative’ Resume (a.k.a. “The Wildcard”)
This was the “let’s throw professionalism out the window” resume. It had colors. It had jokes. It had a skills bar that ranked my “ability to tolerate nonsense” at 99%. It was either a genius move or a surefire way to get blacklisted.
The Results (a.k.a. The Moment of Truth)
50 job applications per resume. 200 applications total.
Here’s what happened:
| Resume Type | Responses Received | Interviews Offered |
|---|---|---|
| Traditional Resume | 12 | 3 |
| Keyword-Stuffed Resume | 18 | 5 |
| Storytelling Resume | 27 | 9 |
| Creative Resume | 31 | 12 |
What This Means for YOU (Yes, YOU, Job Seeker!)
1. The Traditional Resume is… Meh.
Sure, it got some responses, but the traditional resume is the plain oatmeal of applications. It’s safe. It won’t offend anyone. But it also won’t excite anyone.
2. The Keyword-Stuffed Resume Works—For Robots, Not Humans.
More responses? Yes. More interviews? Not really. Turns out, stuffing a resume with “synergy” and “cross-functional collaboration” might trick the ATS, but once an actual human sees it? They can smell the desperation.
3. The Storytelling Resume is a Sleeper Hit.
People love a good story. Hiring managers read this one longer, remembered it, and actually wanted to meet the person behind it. Your career isn’t just a job list—it’s a journey. SELL IT.
4. The Creative Resume Was the King.
This one crushed the competition. It was fun, engaging, and showed personality. Companies in creative fields ate it up, but even some corporate roles responded because, get this—hiring managers are BORED of seeing the same resume 500 times a day.
What You Should Do Right Now
If you’re applying for jobs using the same stale resume over and over, STOP. RIGHT NOW.
Try this instead:
✅ Ditch the robotic resume. Use storytelling elements and achievements that read like a compelling story.
✅ Make your resume actually INTERESTING. It doesn’t have to be neon pink, but a little personality goes a long way.
✅ Customize it per industry. If you’re applying for an accounting job, skip the jokes. If you’re applying for a marketing role? Show some creativity.
✅ Test different versions. Seriously. Apply with a traditional resume, a storytelling one, and a more creative one—and see what works for YOU.
The bottom line? The world of hiring is changing. If you’re stuck in the old ways, you’re getting left behind.
So go. Rewrite that resume. Break the rules. Stand out.
And when you land that dream job? You can thank me later.
(Or at least send me a coffee. ☕)